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Published May 27, 2010

Mario’s been chomping mushrooms and picking fire flowers for more the 20 years now, but after his third Super outing, his wardrobe became a little dull. Sure, the cape and winged cap were neat, but neither had the allure of the Tanooki Suit or the Frog Suit. However, both New Super Mario Bros. Wii and the Super Mario Galaxy games gave our favorite plumber a long-desired makeover. Keeping in that spirit, we present our dream designs for his next interstellar (or terrestrial) adventure. Saving the princess is hard work, but there’s no reason why you can’t look good in the process.

Kappa Suit
(Tailor: Nicolo)

Mario once again takes inspiration from a Japanese folklore creature with the Kappa Suit! Unlike the Tanooki Suit, this water-sprite-inspired garb grants our hero water-based powers to help him excel in those pesky swimming stages. In addition to granting Mario 360 degree turning abilities while storming through the soup, the lily-pad-like bowl that sits atop the suit is capable of shooting streams of water at enemies and is particularly effective at putting out charging bob-ombs. As the Kappa is an extremely polite creature, to access the Kappa suit, Mario must bow (duck) in front of kappa statues, which will release the power-up to Mario to aid him on his quest. Failing to do so, however, might result in kappa-enemies attacking Mario from the depths (they love to feed on children), so mind your manners!

Bugman Suit
(Tailor: Tony)

In an ancient time, before there was Bowser, Mario was harassed by a particular massive ape. In their first two encounters, Mario dodged barrels and fire while climbing girders to reach the lovely “Pauline” (who we all know is really just a palette swap for Peach). But in their third head to head, Mario had apparently gone missing, replaced by the suspiciously similar “Stanley the Bugman.” This guy attacked his enemies with deadly bug spray. After years of turning his back to chemical warfare, Mario has found it necessary to wield the spray gun, but this time, he wields it in the name of more than just his greenhouse; he fights for the sake of the galaxy!

Bob-omb Suit
(Tailor: Kaz)

With great power comes great volatility. The Bob-omb Suit allows the players to generate bob-ombs that detonate after a short period of time. There is a targeting reticule on the ground in front of Mario showing where the bob-omb will be thrown. (They can also be left behind Mario by holding an alternate button.) If Mario is hit while wearing the suit, he will begin to countdown to his own explosion. In order to stop the countdown, he’ll need to take another hit from an enemy.

Matryoshka Suit
(Tailor: Tom)

After obtaining the fabled Babushka Mushroom, Mario will adopt a distinctively wooden and rounded appearance.  Each press of the B button will allow him or the last copy created to pop open and launch a smaller version of himself.  Up to five successively smaller dolls will follow Mario and can be assigned to swarm enemies -finally, revenge for the tiny anti-jump goombas in Super Mario Bros. 3! - and access switches or items in areas too small for regular Mario to enter.  In addition, similar to Pikmin, they can band together in a chain to form bridges or prevent Mario from falling off the edges of cliffs.  As Zangief would say, “Russian folklore is always number one!”

Bunny Suit
(Tailor: Justin Hemenway)

Nintendo has this pesky habit of introducing cool Mario power-ups – the Hammer Bros. suit, the Tanooki Suit, the Metal Cap – and then promptly locking them up in subsequent sequels. Well, the Bunny Suit served the plumber well on his first moon walk back in Super Mario Land 2, so it only seems right to bring it out of the vault. For those of you unfamiliar with the old school Game Boy’s sickly green charms, the Bunny Suit allowed Mario to glide through the air by flapping his ears. For the 2010 model, the suit will also allow him to run much more swiftly, making some of those tricky purple coin challenges a little less daunting.


Starman Suit

Just in case the Bugman Suit isn’t obscure enough for you, this silver oldie from Earthbound will tap into Mario’s telekenetic potential. As long as Mario avoids shield-casting insects, he’s basically invincible. (Rest assured, this one is suitably rare.)

Bob Hoskins Suit

Poor Bob Hoskins can’t catch a break. After the “Mario Bros.” movie nearly killed his career, the real deal is back to finish the job. If you find Mr. Hoskins bumbling around, you can “wear” him to gain all of his mystical “powers.” Enter goombas by “Walking the Dinosaur,” use Bertha’s boots to fly to great heights and blast away Bowser’s castle with your trusty Super Scope. With the Bob Hoskins suit, the possibilities are endless.

One Comment

  1. HBayani HBayani

    lol the Bob Hoskins one takes the cake

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